December 4th, 2002


The Masked Euchre Player

As a vocabulary lesson, I donned my balaclava at the Diesel yesterday after work. I kept it on the whole rest of the time I was there, through the game of Euchre. It was nice not being expected to talk, since I had this thing covering my mouth. I had thoughts later about being some sort of quirky guy who always wears a balaclava. I could develop some kind of reputation. People wouldn't know the state of my beard. I would be expected to talk much less, so I could act like an observer more, quitely looking at the world through my balaclava. I could shock people by showing up somewhere without it. I could meet new people who wouldn't know me without my balaclava, so I cold pass incognito by just not wearing it.

My last trip to the RMV to cancel the registration on the Dodge was so easy (I got to go into the express line, total time in the RMV was about 90 seconds) that I was able to convince theora to go there today to try to figure out some stuff that isn't addressed on the Web site because it's not usual. So, I'm going with her at lunch today, out into the cold to the RMV next to the Chinatown stop on the Orange line (Orange Line? orange line?).

I brought my leftover chicken from Saturday with me to work to eat today, and I'll probably dig into that pretty soon instead of paying $4.00 for a bagel and a soy shake. I hope the water filter thing is fixed, since the chicken is really salty. The water in those throughout the building was apparently yellow yesterday. I didn't hear if they got it fixed or not.

Saturday, thanks to prodding by a certain someone, I spent some time in a coffee shop writing journal type stuff by hand, stuff just for me. I learned (or probably rediscovered) several things. First, I really like writing just for me. Since I know who I am, it is a lot easier for me to be completely open and honest with myself than it is to be that way with other people. I will admit things to myself in writing that I never would in public. However, since I tend to think best by communicating, whether speaking to someone or writing, those things don't necessarily get processed as thouroughly as they should if I don't write them down. So writing stuff just for myself is a good thing. Second, I discovered that my brain works a lot faster than my pen. I'll be halfway through a sentence and already be thinking about the next sentence, or having meta-thoughts about the current sentence, wondering if I should rewrite it, etc. Third, my writing gets really messy after just a short while, in part due to me just being messy, and in part due to trying to hurry my pen to keep up with my brain. Fourth, my hand really starts hurting after just a couple of pages.

So, I decided to try to start making private LiveJournal entries. In a little overa year on LiveJournal, yesterday was my very first private entry. I did one just to sort of try to get used to writing a private entry. Then I did another one with more substance. I guess I've gotten used to it already, since my first impulse this morning after getting into work and checking my email was to write a private entry. So, I hope this will help me process things more, figure myself out more, become a better person. And, as a side benefit, it should help give my future self an idea of what I'm like, who I am, so he can see how far he's come, what changes he's made, since my memory isn't very good for that sort of thing.

Of course, I'm just waiting for the time that I forget to mark a private entry private, and then it'll be like Harriet's notebook being discovered.

Oh, and, as I'm picking the userpic to use with this (I always do that last), I am reminded that I should make a balaclava userpic. I think I can definitely replace the Sierpinski gasket one. I'll have to remember when I have my camera and anothe rperson to take the picture.



I sometimes wonder if I'm
more powerful than I think:
A few choice words,
repeated over time,
can transform a person's
view of the world.

That feeling of vim
is fleeting, though,
as I realize the depth
of my incompetence.

Once a day, need it or not.

Again posted as a comment in dictionary_wotd. Blah. I didn't really feel like writing a poem today. But the public nature of it helped get me to write something. That and a phone conversation earlier this morning.

Vim, vim, skalla bim. Write any poem, just on whim. Vim, vim, skalla bim ban. Write me a poem, fast as you can.


It was cold enough today that I wore my balaclava for the excursion to the RMV, which was very simple. Spent the rest of the time wandering Boston Common. Checked out skating at the Frog Pond. $3 admission, $7 skate rental, apparently for as long as you want to skate. I think I'm definitely going to make it our there this year.