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My first poem - Queue — LiveJournal
January 25th, 2002
12:20 pm


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My first poem
Well, some more thorough searching yielded my journal. So, you all get to see my very first poem that I ever wrote.

Let me set the scene. April 10th, 1992, I'm 15 years old, on a spring break trip to France with the French club at school. We're somewhere that's not Paris at this point (would have to read through the journal to find out, and I can only take so much of 15-year-old me), and I wrote the poem on some random piece of paper (now lost) in my hotel room fairly late at night. I transcribed it into my journal the next day. I was angsting over a girl who was on the trip, who I was trying to have a "relationship" with before I even knew anything about her (I was really dumb in high school, but weren't we all?). Rereading it, I see that I missed a couple of lines when I recited it from memory to cthulhia. This is the one that she claims could be set to music rather well. And, despite how the poem sounds, I have never in my life seriously contemplated suicide. Informal polling of friends throughout the years suggests that this is not necessarily the norm among the type of people I generally hang out with.

My fucking name
is fucking hell
I fucking know
too fucking well
that fucking you
just fucking hate
my fucking guts
I fucking do
not fucking care
if fucking I
am fucking dead
the fucking world
was fucking good
with fucking me
not fucking there
to fucking fuck
all fucking things
to fucking hell
I fucking wish
my fucking heart
would fucking stop
the fucking end


(2 comments | Leave a comment)

[User Picture]
Date:January 25th, 2002 09:37 am (UTC)

well fuck

you fucking wrote that
the fucking day after
my fucking birthday

(right right, back to painting and sorting and shit)
[User Picture]
Date:January 26th, 2002 02:25 am (UTC)
Actually, I rather liked it, and I don't really do poetry. And you don't really sound suicidal at all. You actually sound just like a 15 year old who fucking hates the object of his/her affection for not knowing that they're just grinding your heart to bits. I can definitely relate.
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