?

Log in

No account? Create an account
Dreams - Queue
September 26th, 2005
09:40 am

[Link]

Previous Entry Share Next Entry
Dreams
I had two dreams involving hrafn last night. She features in my dreams not infrequently, but this makes two nights in a row with dreams about her. Why the increase? The second dream last night made it clear.

In the first dream, I had to kill hrafn, and I think it was because she was going to kill me. The method I ended up using as a belt tightened about her neck, and she suffocated with excruciating slowness. Not a very happy dream.

In the second dream, I was moving out (aha!), and I had for some reason just gotten a bird. It was supposedly an African grey, but it was Claude-sized. I discovered that it liked to sit in a water dish and have me pour cool water over it. It would shiver a little, and then it would purr. hrafn came over, and I showed this to her. Earlier in the dream, the bird curled up completely in its water dish, and I thought for a moment that it had died, but it came back up after I poured water on it. I don't remember if this was in the dream or in the post-dream analysis, but thinking the bird was dead brought back vividly the memory of Taylor, the bird that we had for a bit (taken in from hrafn's family, who had taken it in from someone else) that died while hrafn was away so that I had to take its stiff little body in its food dish to the vet to be disposed of. That was a pretty traumatic experience for me.

Anyway, moving. Saturday is when I heard for sure that I would be getting the apartment, so that's when it finally really became real that I was leaving the house, the house that hrafn and I bought together. This is going to be my first time moving without her since I moved away from home for college about 12 years ago. So of course I'm going to have stressful dreams involving her. (And proofreading this, I am struck with the notion that the incident with Taylor was a time I had to deal with something unpleasant without hrafn there. And moving to a place without her is really bringing home the fact that she's not going to be there to help me deal with things.) Maybe the dreams will stop now that I've recognized this.

Tags:

(7 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments
 
[User Picture]
From:zzbottom
Date:September 26th, 2005 03:23 pm (UTC)

Queue point?

(Link)
The method I ended up using
as a belt tightened about her neck


Was that supposed to be "was"?
[User Picture]
From:queue
Date:September 26th, 2005 04:07 pm (UTC)

Re: Queue point?

(Link)
Yup.
[User Picture]
From:hrafn
Date:September 26th, 2005 04:45 pm (UTC)
(Link)
I _was_ there when Taylor died, but I wanted a necropsy to make sure he didn't have anything contagious, and if I recall correctly, I had to go back to work or something, so you went to the vet. And we never did get the food dish back, which I'm still annoyed about.

I'm curious what you think I symbolize in your dreams, or if you think the symbolism is different in different dreams.
[User Picture]
From:queue
Date:September 26th, 2005 05:13 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Weird how I remembered some parts of that so well but not other parts. I guess maybe you were at work and I was the one to find him?

I think the symbolism is probably different for different dreams. Since we lived together for so long, we experienced lots of different things together, so I think you have a lot of different meanings to me.
[User Picture]
From:hrafn
Date:September 26th, 2005 05:15 pm (UTC)
(Link)
No, you and I and Sarah were all in the back room, talking or something - maybe we were checking up on Taylor, cause he'd not been well - and _I_ noticed that he was dead in the dish.
[User Picture]
From:queue
Date:September 26th, 2005 05:17 pm (UTC)
(Link)
That's really bizarre. I totally remember finding him. Maybe just seeing him in the dish was traumatic enough for me that it somehow got elevated in my mind to actually finding him. Flashbacks of touching my brother's cold stiff body in the casket at the wake.
[User Picture]
From:hrafn
Date:September 27th, 2005 01:14 am (UTC)
(Link)
Could be. :(
My Website Powered by LiveJournal.com